What in the Actual F*%#k is Going on in Saskatoon

This is not my regular post and it will not be something I consistently bring my attention to, or yours.  But, reality has made its way into my personal bubble and so I will give my personal opinion.  For what it's worth – as I know it is not worth that much given the dire complexity of the situation.

 I have been hearing that we have had over 300 overdoses in Saskatoon since early March and the numbers keep going up.  The majority of this stems from the homeless people that inhabit downtown Saskatoon.

I, myself, steer clear of the downtown area as I don’t like the vibe.  I would not go as far as to say I fear for my safety, but I know one thing for sure – desperate people do desperate things.

Certain libraries will be closing due to the staff feeling unsafe as the homeless have nowhere to go and have turned to using these public facilities.  

One resident has now reported that “due to the closing of Prairie Harm Reduction, and the bathrooms at the Ahenakew library, I am starting to see human poop on the sidewalks in my neighborhood”...

 What in the actual F*%#k is going on in Saskatoon...?

 I will digress into the deep recesses of my past, back to the year 2001.  This was when methamphetamine first made its way into the rave scene.  At least, that is when I first heard of it.  

Back then it was not known as the sketchy street drug it is today and you could often find ravers sitting in the bathroom passing around a pipe.  But that did not last long.

The darkness that follows that particular drug did not last long in the public eye.  It swooped in, and took out a few of us in the process but quickly went underground as it bonded to the deep desperation and sadness that will always be found in the hearts of anyone struggling with addiction.  

I was not one of the lucky ones and I ended up throwing three years of my life away trying to ease my pain through the high and dissociation that this drug provides.

 I have been clean since 2004 but I guess I have a little insider intel and feel I can speak to the situation at least from a survivor standpoint.  You can think of me like drug addict "light", I was never on the street, nor did I have to turn to a life of crime thanks to my loving family.  But I was suffering.  

My soul was suffering for the loss of my mom.  For the deep pain that knew no consolation.  And for the girl who thought she could fix all her problems all by herself.

And so I know the pain personally that drives so many to use, whether it's meth or fentanyl.  In one way shape or form this pain becomes unbearable.  The drug use takes away the pain for a bit but turns people to desperation as they try to secure the next escape from the hell they have created for themselves.

How does one break free without support?  How does one find the road out of hell? 

 What are we doing to fix this problem as a city? As a nation?  Will the help even work?

I live my peaceful life always knowing in the background that this is happening.  This is happening right in my very city.  It is the collective shadow coming up to show us that we, as a society, are not on the right track.  

If we are all in this together, how long can we pretend not to see the cancerous growth growing in our collective body?

How can we bring the appropriate awareness to the people with the ability to create the solutions?  How do we open our hearts to see that, until we find an appropriate solution (and for the record I have no clue what that could be) we are all held in stasis.

This is a collective lesson and we cannot move forward in our evolution without finding a way to heal this collective wound.  It is not going away and we cannot simply sweep it under the rug.

How do we reposition ourselves?

Is there money for this?  

Who has the money?  

Has the money been hoarded away?

How long can we turn a blind eye, allow funding to fall away and continue to simply not go downtown because “it’s sketchy”?

How long can we avoid the very heart of our municipal community?

How long can we simply avoid downtown Saskatoon?

We are judged by how we treat the weakest among us. The addicts on the street are showing us where we lack empathy, where we lack compassion and where our systems have failed us.

I have done enough of my own inner work to know that abundance is everywhere.  And so I can only assume that this lack of resources is a reflection of the lack mentality that has taken root within our leaders.

If we truly wanted to fix the problem we would create the resources to do it, because we create reality.

I have seen what I have done in my life as one person so I know that, if a room full of highly educated, exceptionally capable people had the right intention - they could move mountains.

So then I wonder, is this a matter of the heart?

Humans are incredibly capable beings.  So then why are those tasked with the ability to do something about this unable to set the proper intentions to create a solution?

Why are libraries closing and why is funding always being revoked?

Are the people in positions of power not heart centered enough to be able to set the coherent intention that will ever help the people in a way that will make a difference?  

Perhaps our leaders are suffering too - perhaps their hearts are still closed. Perhaps we are asking them for too much.

Perhaps this is another collective shadow that sooner or later we need to face.

I know that this is really hard and I will have likely written some very uneducated things that maybe don’t grasp the entire issue - I don’t claim to have the answers, I only wish to provide my opinion and emphasize that humans are truly capable of anything with the right intentions, so perhaps this is a symptom of a much deeper issue.

Please accept this blog as my extremely uneducated opinion.  

Take care out there.

And when the world outside seems like a bit too much, perhaps the answers you are seeking are within. Come stretch with me: Intentions Yoga.